nostalgia

i was watching a highschool friend’s video of her performance of Beyonce’s Single Ladies. she was amazingly good; her voice has matured and now she’s more than a mere singer, she’s also a performer! and to think that about six years ago, i used to torture this girl. like literally torture her.

glue-on-seat, ostracized her kind of torture.

I’m not going to go down the road of taking pity over my own life right now; it’s not Beyoncpectacular, but hey I’m not chewing my hair and counting cracks on my walls.

…….yet.

Still! there is always a still. it’s the new But!

she really grew out of her shell and became this social butterfly I never saw in her. I’m happy for her ( eventually at the end of Form 5 we made up and I no longer threw away her correction tape just because it was green) ( she kept buying a new green one so she had that coming *ahem) success. she’s always been nice to me throughout the schooling years.

regardless of how mean i was to her.

you wanna know how mean i was to her? well here is a secret. there was once, this college guy fell for her and my best friend M was pretty mad about that because she had just rejected his advances. and from M to this girl, it was a great fall in terms of choice. M was bitter, I was the best friend so I did what felt right and fun at that time. I told M, vowed to M, in a very Mean Girls manner,

that I would break Victim girl with the College Guy.

and I succeeded. I gained her trust and made her tell me all her secrets and the status of the courtship. I made a few stuff up, made a few coincidences happen, and voila. He dumped her and wagged his tail back to M.

mission accomplished.

This girl never found out. She was still nice to me after that, a reason why I began to actually look at her as a human being and stopped being cruel to her. Imagine 5 girls walking in a flying V position and one miserable looking one ( miserable because her pinafore probably had intentional ink and dried glue stains all over it. courtesy of us mean bitches) trailing behind. and when she caught up with us?

we’d stop walking, stare and her and say “what? walk ahead lah, you waiting for Mars to fall on your head?”

we existed. and we terrorized her. just because we were the popular kids.

here is the part where it stings a bit. i actually tried to keep in touch with her after highschool. told you i made my peace with my inner demon and i kinda genuinely missed her. sadly (though unsurprisingly) she was always busy with life and seemed to avoid reunions. who could blame her? leaving highschool was probably the best thing that happened to her.

today she’s doing so great. again, I’m happy for her.

who i was, i will never be once again. yet those days are what made me who i am today. no regrets 🙂

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yes la crys was a megahorrific highschool meanie bitch.

don’t give shocked face all.

boo!

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